“When would you say then is the time to fight?”
This marvelous question found its way in a recent conversation. Although I gave an answer in the moment, I have found myself still reflecting on the parameters in question.
We all love a good fight.
Granted there are those personalities that simply withdraw from conflict and will go out of their way to avoid confrontation, or when it strikes, move as rapidly as they can towards resolution. The peacemakers, we will call them. Certainly essential characters, particularly as a balancing act to the drama-laden. Although even peacemakers, while they are peacemaking, are at odds. To quote Dallas Willard on a profound study of the Beatitudes found in his book The Divine Conspiracy:
“[The peacemakers] are always in the middle. Ask the policeman called in to smooth out a domestic dispute. There is no situation more dangerous. Neither side trusts you. Because they know you are looking at both sides, you can’t possibly be on their side.”
We cannot all, nor should we be, peacemakers. Therein lies its own danger. Even though we should all pursue peace. But sometimes peace, and the path to get there, comes with necessary turmoil in its pursuit to uphold uprightness.
And so we must fight.
Fight for justice. Fight for the oppressed. Fight for morality. Fight for truth.
The danger with fighting, however, is that one might begin to feel desperate, especially if the unrelenting force of your attackers is felt. Suddenly you find yourself resorting to any means necessary in the desperate hope that all you are fighting for will indeed be won.
Have you ever felt desperate in the fight?
I know I have. Marital conflict is an easy reference point, and even though you may not be in a married relationship, surely you have seen this type of conflict spill over in your home as a child. Perhaps you are able to exhibit some necessary constraint when conflict arises with friends or Facebook strangers, but conflict with someone intensely close to you might present some rather raw temptations. It is here, in that mode of desperation, that defensiveness or untruth might bubble to the surface. This is where Jordan has heard me say things that would have been better kept unsaid, and the point of conflict becomes tainted by a new issue. Hurt. Hypocrisy. Self-defense. Suddenly all that you were “fighting for” might remain the foundation, but has been covered with straw strewn about. An easy target for destruction, only one gust of wind away from complete collapse.
As much as I have seen desperation in me, it has opened my eyes to see it elsewhere as well. In our nation. In the Church. And in desperation we will excuse the integrity of a just cause for the sake of a bit more flame with which to stoke the fire… or put it out. The willingness to compromise is a subtle one, until we almost shockingly find ourselves saying things we regret, allowing for things we would not otherwise have permitted, and gathering around us just enough untruth to fuel a warranted fight.
What began as a battle of just cause suddenly becomes a battleground for the self.
An excerpt from James’ ancient letter to the church was recently brought to my attention, though by no means is its content “ancient”:
“What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you? You desire but do not have, so you kill. You covet but you cannot get what you want, so you quarrel and fight. You do not have because you do not ask God. When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures.”
Now in this particular context, James was warning of a desire for material possessions that were driving people to a form of jealous rage. Yet his insight is rather telling of human nature. A battle begins to stir in your very soul, and you start to feel desperate. In that desperation, what then happens when you don’t get what you want? Whether in family, in government, in justice, or whatever your area of vindicated zeal: You quarrel. You fight. You kill.
In other words, you do whatever it takes, even if what it takes undermines the integrity of the fight itself. Even if the fight undermines the integrity of your soul.
Indeed, everyone loves a good fight. That is, just so long as we are in the lead. And if not…
EXPOSITION: What fight are you in? Have you moved into desperation mode? What compromises have you permitted for the sake of winning the fight; for the sake of getting what you want, even if justified in your desire?
RISE: What may be more necessary than the fight itself is the state of the battleground in your soul. Although no one phrase will cover it all, know that humility is a stark contrast to desperation.
DENOUEMENT: “If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and I will forgive their sin and will heal their land.” 2 Chronicles 7:14